Monthly Take Aways #5

 Structure Your Life in Such a Way
That You Can Live Without Each Other
 
Every month I am sharing one of my 7 Take Aways on how to live life to the fullest,
learn to grieving and support others and have “The Talk” about end of life, long before
it arrives and diffuse the fear. Today, we are looking at Take Away #5:

Structure your life in such a way that you can live without each other.

We all know the couple who were married for “100” years. The husband either became
ill or died and the wife had never paid a bill. Maybe she doesn’t even drive. Or,
the same couple, the wife becomes ill or dies and the husband has never even made a sandwich. The truth is, that used to be the way it was, “back in the day.” The man was
the one “bringing home the bacon” and the wife was the housewife. I’m not really sure
what they did when they faced end of life. But here’s the thing; couples are still doing this.
We are often totally dependent on our partners for certain things.

It’s great to have jobs that you do in your house and that your spouse has his/her own
jobs. BUT… even if the person is away, is ill or yes…dies… don’t we think that we should be able to do each other’s jobs? Why would we want to face that in a crisis? (I remember a
woman telling me that when her husband died, she had no idea how to manage her house
or live on her own. She was petrified!).

So I had to make my own decisions. I needed to empower myself. So I looked at Geordie’s
(my husband) tools and toolbox. Now I have my own cute little hammer and my own toolbox.
​I don’t even care what anyone thinks of my pink basket of tools. I have my own nails, screwdrivers AND I can also use the electric drill, thank you very much. I learned how
to operate the generator so that when the power goes out I can start it and not be a
“damsel in distress”.
Really something to think about; what is making you dependent in your house and what
could you do to change that? It is a hard way to live when you think, “Oh my goodness,
if my spouse was away, I wouldn’t be able to do a, b or c. Let’s stop doing that to each
other and to ourselves.

Structure your life in such a way that you are resilient and self-reliant.