For my blog this week, I am introducing you to Eric Goll.
Eric is a wonderful person making a difference. I’ve included a link to the podcast we did together too. I hope you find this information helpful!
 
The mission of Empowering Ability Podcast:

 At Empowering Ability, we’re about creating equal opportunities for people
with intellectual or developmental disabilities. It is our mission to help you
help your loved ones enjoy life to its fullest, EVERY DAY.

https://www.empoweringability.org/single-post/YvonneHeath
 
 
Eric & Sarah's Story
 
I'm Eric Goll, and this is a picture of my older sister (Sarah), and I.
Sarah was born with a disability that impacts her both intellectually and physically. We grew up with what we both consider typical sibling relationship; 
we played, we laughed, we cried, and we fought with each other.
 
I noticed things were different when I was about 8 years old as I pushed my
big sister's stroller in the mall. As I pushed Sarah, I started to notice people
were staring at us, especially the other kids. As the other kids stared,
I stared back. I stuck out my tongue at them, and on occasion I even gave them
the middle finger (I was a secret bad ass 8 year old). I asked myself why were
they staring? I realized my family was different than theirs.
 
In my 20's, I started to distance myself from my family as my sister sat at home isolated in my parents basement. Tension built as my sister tried to be
her own person, but my parents kept her safeguarded making decisions they thought were best. My sister rebelled, and our family started to fall apart. 

I had a decision to make; keep my head stuck in the sand, or become a contributing and compassionate brother and son. I chose the latter and it has
been a trans-formative experience for me, and my family. I coached with my
sister to design and create the life she wanted for herself. Sarah now lives
with me, directs her own support, and has control over her decisions with
support from her circle of support. 
​
Through this experience with my family I found my purpose: to support
 families in creating their version of their best lives. I firmly believe that our
best lives are ordinary lives (not special), and lived in relationship in our communities. As a coach and a podcast host, my job is to support families to 
live a powerful and joyful life, and to share with you the best tools and
resources available from world class leaders in disability. Be assured, these
tools are much better than the tool I could have taught you when I was 8
years old (giving society the middle finger). If my story resonates with you
and you are supporting someone with a disability to live their best life,
I would love it if you came along on this journey together.

We can stay connected by subscribing to my blog/ podcast or
if you can inquire about working with me!

With Love and Respect,
Eric Goll
 
Here is a link to the podcast with Eric and I.

​
https://www.empoweringability.org/single-post/YvonneHeath
 

Thank you for being part of our community!
   Purchase your copy of Love Your Life to Death here,
    our Audio, From Avoidance to Resilience or your
          #IJustShowedUp bracelet. 

     Stay tuned for Yvonne's TEDx talk in 2019!

 
For my first I Just Showed Up radio show of 2019, (airing Saturday
January 12th, then available on the podcast [Here]
I decided to highlight the incredible guests of 2018; so many phenomenal
people taking their life experiences—the good, the bad, the challenges, the
traumas—and they created something good out of it. They share their stories,
they are helping and supporting others in their communities. They are going above and beyond. Truly extraordinary.

So if their story resonates with your story, perhaps they are someone you can
reach out to. Because that’s what they’re all about; people helping people. I am truly honoured to have had them on my show. 2019 is going to be an
extraordinary year!

Here are some highlights:

*We are creating our online program,
which will be available in the next few months

*March 7th:
Keynote Speaker at PARO Event at Hidden Valley Resort
in Huntsville, ON. Supports enterprising women.
https://goo.gl/tr17YK

*March 21st:
Volunteer at the Global Influence Summit in San Diego,CA.
For Transformational Thought Leaders.
https://goo.gl/u4sSfm

*March 30th:
Speaker at TEDxOrillia
https://goo.gl/vgFkho

                               
And that’s only the beginning.
Thank you, everyone, for all that you do.
Keep up the great work!

Let’s make 2019 TRANSFORMATIONAL,
INCREDIBLE AND AMAZING!! 

​2018 “I Just Showed Up” Radio Guests:

1.Allie Chisolm- Smith
Co-founder of Enliven-living well with a cancer diagnosis.http://www.enlivenmuskoka.ca/


2.Kevin Cutler: 
Trainer/Facilitator for International Institute for Restorative Practice Canada https://www.linkedin.com/in/kevin-cutler-844042114/

Real Life Talks guest: https://goo.gl/1FZcHu

3.Robert Alldred-Hughes:
Sharing his journey of “coming out” in his twenties, and living a life he loves in Muskoka!

4.Karen Litchfield:
Co-founder of The Clothes Closet, located at Huntsville High School. https://www.facebook.com/theclothesclosetHHS/


4.Suzanne Witt-Foley:
Speaker and Mental Health First Aid Educator
https://www.suzannewittfoley.com/

Real Life Talks guest: https://goo.gl/DxSLzM
 
6.Claudette Chartrand:
Healing Facilitator https://wavesofhealing.ca/  


7.Eva Zachary and Jody North:
Muskoka Victim Services-Support for victims of crime and tragedy. http://muskokavs.ca/


8.Carolyn Vandyken:
Reg. physiotherapist, specializing in pelvic health issues for men and women https://www.physioworksmuskoka.com/

Real Life Talks guest: https://goo.gl/peY3yf

9.Gael Bishop:
Fitness From Within-Coaching For Life. (Facebook)
Gael shared her story of alcoholism and getting the help she needed!
 
10.Ciara Thompson:
From bullied to Miss Canada 2017.
​Advocate for homelessness.
Now entering Miss Galaxy Pageant
 
 
11.Paul Mascarin:
From Muskoka Kia.
e a volunteer as an individual, support your community as a company
 
12.Valerie Fleck:
Co-founder of 100 Women Who Care Muskoka.
​Supporting local charities! https://www.100wwcmuskoka.com/
 
13.Heather Berg:
Founder of the Table Soup Kitchen Foundation.
Bringing Community together to help others.
https://thetablefoundation.ca/


                             Thank you for being part of our community!
                     Purchase your copy of Love Your Life to Death here,
                       our Audio, From Avoidance to Resilience or your
                                         #IJustShowedUp bracelet. 

                          Stay tuned for Yvonne's TEDx talk in 2019!

If you are like me, you’ve made New Year’s Resolutions every year.
You may have followed through with some, and not with others. The ones that
fell to the wayside made you feel guilty and critical of yourself. You may have
been bound and determined to really stick to your guns the next year and lose
that weight, quit smoking, save money, etc.

Did it work, or did you see yourself as a failure again? It is great to have goals,
but not great to be your worst critic. Why not become your biggest fan and lean into whatever it is you’d like to change?

That’s what I have finally done in the second act of my life. If it takes you less
than five decades to get there, more power to you! I used to be so hard on myself when I did not accomplish what I set out to do. I would berate myself for failing again and compare myself to others. I focused on all that I didn’t do well and minimized my accomplishments. No more.

It truly is sad that we often will speak to ourselves in a way that we wouldn’t
speak to others. We sure wouldn’t tolerate hearing others speak to those
we care about in that way.

Well, I’ve fired my inner critic. Although I can still hear that negative voice
in the background (never really goes away), I now pay attention and catch it.
I let it know, “Thanks, but I’m not interested in what you have to say!”
I’ve become my greatest cheerleader, my inner coach. Isn’t that a much better
way to live? I don’t depend on others for that pat on the back or that “Way to go!”
I give it to myself and tell myself what a great job I’ve done. Of course, it’s nice
to hear from others, but I don’t count on it.

When I do make a mistake or break a promise to myself, I acknowledge it,
learn from it, and do better next time. No more berating. When I know I would
be better off if I broke a bad habit, but don’t feel quite ready, I start by saying,
“I want to want to.” I want to want to lose weight, quit drinking, exercise more,
or whatever it may be.

Start there. Then be kind along the path. It isn’t easy changing habits,
especially if you are surrounded by others who enable you or have the same
habits. If you truly want to change something, find people who are doing what you’d like to do! When I quit drinking on December 31st, 2015, I was not
sure if I would be successful long term. A funny thing was that one of the
things that helped me stick to it was watching how uncomfortable other
people were around a non-drinker. “Really, are you sure you don’t want something? Oh, I’m sure you can have just one!” Wow, I thought,
we really have a society that revolves around drinking!

It was a big Ah-hah moment for me, and fueled my determination.
The list of reasons to drink was pretty short; social, love red wine, calms me.
The list of why not, on the other hand, seemed endless; waste of money,
a problem when you want to drive, poor decisions made, hangovers,
munchies and poor diet, shields us from the feelings we need to feel
(especially grief), and on it went.

I’m not telling you to quit drinking, I’m saying that to be the very best version
of yourself is your greatest gift. So, if there are habits that are getting in the way
of that, start by wanting to want to change. Become your best cheerleader and coach, find others who live the way you want to live, then lean into change, knowing that it may take some time.

The greatest resolution you can make is to resolve to love yourself, be happy,
be your own best friend, take baby steps in the right direction, correct your
path with kindness, and you just never know what magic awaits you.

Celebrate you, in 2019 and always!
​
Thank you for being part of our community!
Purchase your copy of Love Your Life to Death here,
 our Audio, From Avoidance to Resilience or your
#IJustShowedUp bracelet. 

Stay tuned for Yvonne's TEDx talk in 2019!

Well, I have to say that I am proud of myself. I tried something new,
totally out of my comfort zone. I read that there was a “Women’s Getaway” for
24 hours. 14 women getting together (most I did not know), just having a little time to unplug, maybe get to know each other but also to have time to
themselves in this busy life.

As much as I love going out and speaking being with many people, when I get home, I usually stay home. I don’t get out very often, outside of events. So I thought, “I’m going to be adventurous, I’m going to do this.” And guess what?
I had the greatest 24 hours. It was incredible. We made arts and crafts
(when is the last time you coloured or used glue?). We allowed all feelings, allowing anything for anybody; sing, dance, be on your own, have time to
yourself. Unplug, be supported, maybe create some new friendships
and get to know more about yourself.

I tried something new and spent time in a beautiful cabin on a frozen lake. Beautiful scenery. A few of us actually went for a snowshoe-7 kms around
the lake! I got to know some pretty amazing ladies.

So I encourage you to get out of your comfort zone and connect.
Because it really is all about connection. It’s about connection with yourself
and others. Something we need to do more.

We put away our cell phones and talked, danced, laughed and had fun.
It doesn’t get much better than that!

Get unplugged and really get connected.
Try something new.

Thank you for being part of our community!
Purchase your copy of Love Your Life to Death here,
 our Audio, From Avoidance to Resilience or your
#IJustShowedUp bracelet. 

Today I am back in the Hunters Bay Studio. I am here with Heather Berg,
who founded the Table Soup Kitchen Foundation in 2006. I love this woman!
She has helped thousands of people in our community. Heather, please tell
us a little bit more about the Table Soup Kitchen Foundation.

We have 6 different services that we provide free of charge to the community, anyone can come for any length of time. You can come once or as many
times as you need to.

*The Table Soup Kitchen (Meals at two local churches on Monday and Thursday)

*The Table Food Bank which is open 3 days a week (9 Hanes St)

*The Table Exchange Store in the same building where you can exchange anything you have for something else at no charge,

*The Table Love Connection-our extra special programs- kids Christmas shopping, gifts for kids, music, back to school supplies etc. Taking what someone wants to share and pass it on to someone who needs that love. That’s why it is the love connection… (Not to be confused with a dating service!)

It’s incredible, everything you do! If someone is having a hard time, even if
it is temporary, they can just come by and see you. You help anybody anytime.
I love that!
​
People can learn more about our programs at www.thetablefoundation.ca.
We have a donate button, and a place where you can get in touch with us if
you would like to volunteer. Come by and check it out! We can give you a tour,
I also wanted to mention the last two programs we offer-

*A community kitchen as well as the men’s shelter.

It’s a hub of activity we just want to bring our community together
and Just Show Up!

Go see the table soup kitchen, you will be amazed and want to be a part of it.
Every little bit of time or money helps. Thank you Heather. You are amazing.
Find a table soup kitchen in your community and if there is not one…
start one like Heather did!

Don’t forget to tune in to our radio show on Sat Dec 15 at 8am right here on Hunters Bay Radio 88.7 fm

Thank you for being part of our community!
Purchase your copy of Love Your Life to Death here,
 our Audio, From Avoidance to Resilience or your
#IJustShowedUp bracelet. 

There are many ways to Just Show Up.
Not only at certain times of the year. This is a great clip shared by "@Appreciate" showcasing a gentleman who regularly visits a Neonatal ICU in Atlanta.

For the last 12 years David Deutchman hugs, holds and talks to all the little
people that need some extra love. He is a"baby buddy".
They call him the ICU Grandpa.

Over the next few weeks or even months, take some time, and think;
What could I do to Just Show Up and make a difference in someone else's life?

It does not need to take a lot of time, effort, or even money,
​but it will make a difference! Thank you "ICU Grandpa" for Just Showing Up.

We love sharing great stories of individuals that know the importance of the #IJustShowedUp movement. Feel free to connect and share your story with us.

​
Thank you for being part of our community!
Purchase your copy of Love Your Life to Death here,
 our Audio, From Avoidance to Resilience or your
#IJustShowedUp bracelet.

Hello everyone, I submit a monthly article to Community Living Ontario,
and thought I'd share this one with you. As the Christmas season approaches,
emotions are heightened; for some it's the greatest time of year and for others
it's the hardest. Please reach out to those who are struggling. I promise, it will bring you even more joy to know that you Just Showed Up for someone in need!

Ah Christmas! A time of family, friends, loved ones, great meals, and lots of presents, right? Or is it not so happy holidays? Is it a time of loneliness, stress, and arguing?  Maybe you even fight about what the season should be called?
It’s a time for all of it. For some, their favourite season, for others the most dreaded time of year. So, what can we do to change that?

I must admit that I have my own work to do, to not feel anxious about the upcoming season. I will not be lonely and will most likely receive a gift or two, even though I’m not one for lots of gift-giving. My anxiety comes from being
an empath, and watching the people around me suffering and others
who create their own excessive suffering.

Throughout the years, I have watched people joylessly shop, shove, and push through crowds and complain about how much money they have to spend on gifts.

I have heard stories of having to travel to several different places to appease ALL family members over the holidays with the obligatory visit. Others “slave
over a hot stove” for days upon days in preparation for the large crowd to feed, who may or may not bring food, and will they help with cleaning up?
Maybe, maybe not.

I have watched nurses and others who had to work on December 25th and
 not have their loved ones with them that day, completely fall apart.

So, I have to work at rising above the angst at a time we should be celebrating
love, regardless of what Christmas does or does not mean to us. If it is not a religious celebration for you, it is still most likely a time with holidays,
children out of school, and an opportunity to reflect on what is good in life.
It can also be a time for reflection as the New Year approaches.

But how can we re-frame the negative? How can we create more happiness and
less stress? How? By knowing that we have a choice. It is our choice to make, whether someone else agrees or not. I choose to be happy.
Here is my two cents and unsolicited advice:

1. Call it whatever you’d like.
Christmas, Hanukkah, the Holidays, Feliz Navidad…  whatever resonates
with you. Don’t fret about what your neighbours call it. To each their own.

2. If you want to buy gifts, buy gifts.
If you don’t, don’t. If you choose to, buy gifts within your budget.
Shop early, get things on sale (well, if it’s too late for that, try this next year!). Why do we have to be extravagant? Is that real meaning of this holiday?
Isn’t love and togetherness enough?

If you’re buying gifts, why not purchase certificates for outings together,
like tubing, bowling, movie night, eating at a restaurant, swimming and so on.
We are a society of consumers and over-spenders. Only you can change that.
My husband, Geordie, and I only buy a few gifts for our children, and we set a reasonable limit. The rest of the family, our presence is our present.
That’s it, and that’s good enough!

3. One person doing all of the cooking? I don’t think so.
Even if someone loves to cook, should they really miss out on fun festivities?
If they insist on doing all the cooking, they most certainly should not be doing
any of the cleaning. I have met many people, mostly women, who are martyrs; doing all the cooking and cleaning themselves, and complaining about it.
How does everyone else just let that happen?

I’m sorry. The 1950s are over. If we have a dinner at our house, it’s potluck. Everyone brings something and everyone helps to clean up. Even the children
help to clear the table and wipe the counters. It helps them to become thoughtful adults. “Many hands make light work” makes holidays more pleasant for everyone.

4. My last and most important point.
There are many, many people who have to work on December 25th or cannot
be with their loved ones. And others who are facing their first Christmas
after the death of someone they loved dearly.

For those working or not able to be with loved ones that day, celebrate
another day. Period. Create a grateful day wherever you are on December 25th.
As the song goes, “if you can’t be with ones you love, then love the ones you’re with.” Others who are working or not with their families wish they could be
with them too. Make your time together as awesome as possible.
You get to be the person who brings joy to the day.

If you are someone who is going through the holidays alone or you are
grieving—whatever your loss may be—take extra good care of yourself. Do what
you need to do for you. If you want to be alone, be alone. Acknowledge and
allow your feelings. If you want to be with people, do that. Don’t worry about
not being cheery or bringing others down. Let them love you and carry you
though. Request that they acknowledge and allow your feelings and not to try
to fix you. You can’t fix grief, it’s a natural part of healing. Just Show Up
for yourself, and let others Just Show Up for you. (I’m always here too!)

If you want to feel true happiness in your life and throughout the year,
each and every day, live by the wise word of our Great Uncle Ken:

Help people, help people, help people. Never stop helping people!

May you find love and gratitude this season and always,
no matter what else comes your way.

​
Community Living Ontario Editor's note: 
​Yvonne Heath is an inspirational speaker and makes periodic contributions to Update Friday. Her message often relates to grief and loss, and how we can overcome them in the different aspects of our lives. Click here to read her introductory article. Yvonne is also the author of Love Your Life to Death. Click here to order your copies today.

​I am just off to a meeting but wanted to take a moment to share how
excited (and thankful) we are about everything that happened in 2018.

2018 was incredible, we shared our message near and far -
even in Kelowna – for the Huntington Society of Canada Conference.
One of the greatest honours of my life!

We have so many things coming up, that we are just twitching with excitement.
But, we cannot tell you everything - just yet.
We can share that we will be have a wonderful Christmas special,
and...

 In the New Year I will have my on-line program available!  
I am thrilled to be able to offer that to you in early 2019.
and...

We also (after two years) have created our affiliate program!
This program can support individuals and organizations with their fundraising goals. The best part is that it is all 100% automated.

Anywhere around the world, we can help! 
Feel free to connect with Geordie (here) to learn more.

We also have just a couple of other things…but I can’t share just yet.

Thank you everyone!

Please follow and share our blogs with your communities,
like us on social media and...we have now made it even easier to
subscribe to our YouTube channel too!

The Best is Yet to Come!


Thank you for being part of our community!
Purchase your copy of Love Your Life to Death here,
 our Audio, From Avoidance to Resilience or your
#IJustShowedUp bracelet.

I am back at Hunter’s Bay Radio studio and had an amazing interview with
Valerie Fleck who shares: I am a resident of Port Carling and along with my partner Dayle Ross, we started a group called,
100 Women Who Care Muskoka.

The concept is simple; women get together four times a year and each bring $100.00. We crowd source that money together and donate it to local charities.

It is the most brilliant, amazing and generous idea. I love the whole concept.
These women have already given thousands of dollars to the
Muskoka Women's Advocacy Group and Muskoka Victim Services, and
just last week Hospice Muskoka was the recipient of $10,000.00!

Yes, it happened really fast. We only started this is March 2018
and our last donation was $10600.00, which was fantastic! It really makes
a big impact in a community when a small charity receives a big donation.
We encourage more members and other charities to sign up or to learn more.
 www.100wwcmuskoka.com.
 

How often do we hear that an organization is not asking for money?
or they want to give money!
Wow!!  This could be in your community too.

Another example of how an organization and individuals
can #JustShowUp and give back to community!
 
Listen to our show on Saturday November 17, 2018 at
8am - 88.7FM or on the podcast at
www.huntersbayradio.com

​
Thank you for being part of our community!
Purchase your copy of Love Your Life to Death here,
 our Audio, From Avoidance to Resilience or your
#IJustShowedUp bracelet.

How can we Just Show Up for the grieving?
This video says it all!

It's so hard to know what to do when your friends are hurting.
The thing is, you can't cheer someone up by telling them to look on the
bright side, or by giving them advice. It just doesn't work. Watch this video to learn the one thing that will improve all of your "I'm here for you" intentions,
and be that supportive friend you most want to be.

Thank you Megan Devine and Refuge in Grief for your ongoing work,
for Just Showing Up for people and giving everyone a place to talk about and tell the truth about grief. For my friends, I invite you to learn more about the work that Megan does:

www.refugeingrief.com

​
Thank you for being part of our community!
Purchase your copy of Love Your Life to Death here,
 our Audio, From Avoidance to Resilience or your
#IJustShowedUp bracelet.

We are in Kelowna, BC, and I just wanted to share my spectacular moment
with you. We climbed down a very steep hill to incredible rapids and a
water fall. We are having such a wonderful time visiting our older son Tyler
and I will be speaking at the Huntington Society of Canada Conference on November 3rd, 2018. What an honour!

I am so completely filled with gratitude and happiness that I just wanted to
take a moment to say “thank you” to everyone who has been supportive and
for being our cheerleaders—I couldn’t have done it without you. 
I am now going to climb that steep hill… I can do it!! Great symbolism there! Sometimes the hills are steep, just hang onto something on your way up.

I am loving life here in Kelowna!
Thank you again for everything. For believing in me. 
For knowing that I could climb these steep hills. You can too!

​I love all of you,
and thank you for loving us!


Thank you for being part of our community!
Purchase your copy of Love Your Life to Death here,
 our Audio, From Avoidance to Resilience or your
#IJustShowedUp bracelet.

 
I have spoken a lot, about my 7 Take Aways, and Take Away #6:
Find your Post, and hold onto it. And your Post is anything you can turn to--
no matter what—in times of despair. It can be there for you. Yoga, meditation, religion, spirituality, art, music. And for me, it’s Nature. I go out in Nature
and I feel connected to something greater than me. I can hug a tree… literally,
I will hug a tree, and I am reminded that whatever I am going through is
only temporary. Like in Nature, you see the seasons and everything
constantly changing. And change is the only constant.
So Nature is my Post.

But also, sometimes (often, actually), in the busyness of life, you need a pause.
As my good friend, Julie Veitch (www.innercorecoach.com) says;

Stop. Breathe. Be Here Now.

In all the hectic-ness of everyday life, we don’t take that time, because we
don’t feel that we have enough time. We’re too busy. But you know, 5 or 10
minutes in Nature can change everything for me. Going for a walk will make
all the difference. It can change the rest of your day. So I encourage you,
take some time in Nature, no matter where you live.
If it’s near sand, a park in the city… wherever you are.

 Take the time to let Nature rejuvenate you!

It will be worth it, I promise.
Where do you love to spend time in Nature?
Share your comments below...

Thank you for being part of our community!
Purchase your copy of Love Your Life to Death here,
 our Audio, From Avoidance to Resilience or your
#IJustShowedUp bracelet.

Back in the HBR studio, with Paul Mascarin, the owner of Muskoka Kia.
We’ve been talking about how he supports his community, and how individuals
and companies can also support their communities.

Paul: We talked about how you can donate your time, money if you can,
joining a service club (if you can make the time), all worthwhile things
and just giving back to the community.

Yvonne: Absolutely! You can always do something. It doesn’t have to be
a grand gesture, it doesn’t have to take a lot of money or time.

Paul adds: As they’ve said for centuries, “Every penny helps!”

Y: Every penny does help, and that is a very important message.
$5.00 is better than no dollars. 30 minutes is better than no time.

So, please ask yourself, “How can I best support my community?”
If we all do a little bit more, we’ll all be that much better off!

Paul: The entire community will.
                                                        
*As a side note, We are very grateful to Paul and the entire
Muskoka Kia team. They always make sure our vehicles are serviced and
ready to go. Kia supports us as we travel.We sure do put a lot of kms on our cars!

Thank you, Muskoka Kia, for continuously supporting your community
and
Love Your Life to Death! 


Thank you for being part of our community!
Purchase your copy of Love Your Life to Death here,
 our Audio, From Avoidance to Resilience or your
#IJustShowedUp bracelet.
​

 
I am being transparent and sharing with you, that I was very disappointed!

As you know, I’ve left my nursing career to help create a culture
of change where we normalize conversations about grief and talk about it
BEFORE it arrives too. One of the things I’ve wanted to do is a Ted Talk.
For those who don’t know what they are (and if you don’t, you google it!),
they are “Ideas Worth Spreading”, in 18 minutes or less.
It’s been on my bucket list from day one.

I was well-prepared, I applied and was short listed, from 100 to 14 people
(very exciting!!). Then I went for an interview and it went very well; except one
of the interviewers was not able to attend. But the person I spoke with was very enthusiastic about my message. I felt hopeful. But a couple of weeks later,
I received an email letting me down apologetically. I did not make the final cut.

I was SO deeply disappointed, because Ted Talks are such a wonderful way
to share your message and so validating when you’re a speaker. I realize,
just like grief, life and everything in between… it’s like a roller coaster.

I’ve had great successes lately; my Alumnus of Distinction Award,
I’m was on the organizing committee and speaking at an international hospice/palliative care conference in Boston and much more.

So many great things and yet I had to feel my deep disappointment.
I had a little pity party—not going to lie—and I was a little crabby
(just ask my family!). And then I moved on! I know I will do my Ted Talk.

Disappointments are a part of this life journey we call life.
​Acknowledge and allow your feelings, then brush yourself off and keep on going.

And I promise you—I will announce here and now—that I will do my Tedx Talk before the end of 2019. Mark my word and hold me to it!

Have you been disappointed lately—and moved on???


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​
​

I am recording this in September, 2018, and we are in the wake of
another natural disaster that hit our world. Three tornadoes destroyed many
homes in our nation’s capital of Ottawa, Ontario. There are so many people displaced, grieving and devastated.

This, of course, is not the first disaster that people have faced.
But it is another reminder that life is so unpredictable and change is the only constant. And in this, when there is such complex grief and so much going on…
It’s just begun. Grief of this magnitude (some people have died, pets died, belongings lost, uncertainty with insurance coverage, survivor guilt for those who didn’t lose their homes…), it goes on and on, and affects so many people-
directly and indirectly.

So, I felt compelled to share my message again!
When you don’t know what to do and you don’t know what to say,
it’s awkward and you can’t fix it;three words:

 Just Show Up!

You can make a difference! It doesn’t have to be a grand gesture.
Even the smallest act of kindness can make such a difference for people;
hug, text, email, call, sit silently, reach out bring food, help with… whatever
they need help with! Sometimes that just help with the daily tasks of living.

My husband, Geordie, is in Ottawa. He is part of a team that is helping out.
And I am reaching out to people and checking in, and I will continue to check in. And I ask you to do the same in any situation, wherever you are, if someone is facing something where they need you to Just Show Up, just be there for them,
be present and keep checking in. That’s the other big thing, we need to keep checking in with people. Many of the relief organizations have partnered to create one "go to" website if you would like to donate and help people affected in Ottawa. I have included the link here 

I am sending love to everyone
 who is struggling with something today!
​

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​As many of you know I have left my nursing career to help create
a culture of change so we can do better, live well, grieve well and die well.
And I am so excited to say that, I have truly met my tribe!! From September 21st
to the 23rd, 2018, I attended the inaugural Death Symposium in Toronto, Ontario.

It was one of the most incredible experiences of my life!
Over 300 people attended and speakers from all around the world, who have
the same passion and purpose. And the incredible founders, Sun and Ramona’s vision for this symposium was:

It's a movement to explore and
change how we reconcile life & death.

An innovative gathering of some of the most influential, stimulating and inspirational minds and change-makers; from teachers and authors, to
end of life care providers on the ground, to traditional healers from
North America and beyond. We gather to learn, experience and reconcile
our relationship and understanding of life and death.
 
And truly, that is exactly what this incredible experience was. We learned,
we gathered, we supported each other, we laughed we cried; it was
life-changing. They also said: We have brought together some of the most
sought after speakers and visionaries.

They certainly did. I cannot even name them all but here are a few:
BJ Miller—you must see his Ted Talk,  Caitlin Doughty, who shared her experience of observing funerals from around the world and how we need
to create change, Kenn Pitawanakwat; author, cultural grief specialist and
he shared his blessing and his book on his journey of when his son died--
beautiful, wonderful soul. Stephen Jenkinson spoke and also entertained
us with his musical band (along with others) Saturday evening, and so many
more. There was also Dr. Naheed Dosani, who co-founded PEACH;
Palliative Education And Care for the Homeless.

We talked about natural burial, home funerals and how we can create a
culture of change. So I encourage you to learn about the speakers, look at
the Death Symposium page. Together we can do this! I am more excited
about than ever. I am so grateful to the founders, to all who attended
and to everyone who is out there being a change-maker. This takes many
voices and action, but we can do it. We can do much better to live well, grieve
​ well and die well. Thank you so much, everyone. See you next year!!!

Learn more about the speakers here 


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Back in the Hunter’s Bay Radio studio, I had the honour of interviewing
Ciara Thompson and her mom Heather. Ciara shared her wonderful
and difficult journey; from anxiety, depression and being bullied to being
crowned Miss Canada 2017! She truly shows us how far you can come!

I asked Ciara to share her most important message:
My most important message is to follow through with your goals, little goals,
and make a game plan as to how you can accomplish them. It will help you
grow as a person. I think  that’s pretty much what life is about—becoming the best version of yourself. Ultimately you will create a chain reaction and you’ll
be able to create a brighter future.

I feel compelled to add: You are often capable of so much more than
you ever dreamed! You didn’t, for one minute, dream of being Miss Canada?
Not even for a second! You struggled and you had a hard time, but at age 24
you started entering pageants and… When at 25, You won! It's an Incredible
story, seriously! I am just so proud of Ciara. And sometimes I’m sure people
havean impression of beauty pageant contestants and their goals of
“World Peace”like in the movie, “Miss Congeniality".
I asked Ciara what she is passionate about and she shared her goals:

I am so passionate about helping people, specifically those who
are homeless. I think they are kind of looked over and that’s where I’d like
to hone in and really make a change.

This young woman is so lovely (and so is her supportive mom!)
and I will support her in any way I can.

Ciara is amazing, inspiring and shows that you can accomplish almost anything.

From bullied to Miss Canada 2017.

Click here to see more about Ciara!

​Wow! I don’t think I could pull that off,
but if that is your goal… GO FOR IT!
​
What do you dream of?


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​

​As you know, I aspire to help people to live life to the fullest, learn to grieve
and support others and have “The Talk” about end of life, long before it
arrives and diffuse the fear. And every now and again I connect with someone
very special and they share something that has a profound impact.

Matthew Ruttan is one of those people. I connected with the Ruttan Family
a few years ago. Sadly Eric Ruttan, father and husband, died of cancer.
But at his service, Matthew did something very special. He handed out cards
to those in attendance. The words on the card stayed with me. In fact I
have the card in my wallet, have printed it out in many places and it is even
part of my presentations.

When we are grieving, when someone we love has died, it is a difficult journey
to navigate. People often ask me, “How do I get through this? What do I do?” Matthew’s words really helped me offer an answer. Here’s what that card said:

Be the Evidence, that Someone’s Life Made a Difference.

Be the evidence that someone’s life made a difference. Wow! When I read
those words it takes my breath away. It speaks to my heart and to my soul.
It makes me feel hopeful. The best way we can honour people we love who
have died—Big Love, Big Grief—is by moving though our deepest grief, acknowledging and allowing, knowing and accepting that it will impact our
hearts forever. But if we can live our life to the fullest, and we can be the
evidence that their life made a difference… I feel like that is a tremendous
way to honour them.

I would love to hear your stories, of how you are being the evidence…
I hope these words touch your heart as well, and help you to carry on to the
other side where you can feel joy again, and you can…

Be the Evidence, that Someone’s Life Made a Difference.

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I am sitting in a beautiful park in Boston, Massachusetts.
We’ve just spoken at an international hospice/palliative care conference.
We then played tourist and did the trolley and harbour tour.
And now I am having a really wonderful moment.

One of my most favorite movies, for so many reasons, is Good Will Hunting.
Robin Williams who plays in the movie, lives forever in my heart.
And I am in awe of Matt Damon and Ben Affleck and all they overcame and
their determination to create this movie. And the story… amazing.
If you haven’t seen it, I think you should.

I am sitting on a special bench with Geordie, where Matt Damon and Robin Williams—well, the characters they played—had a life-changing heart-to-heart.

When someone believes in you and sees something in you,
that you don’t see yourself, it can really change your life.

And that very talk happened right on this bench, where we are sitting,
and Robin and Matt were staring at the most beautiful scenery I am enjoying. 
So I wanted to share my magical moment with you.

Dreams can come true, if we make them happen.
Coming to Boston and speaking at this conference, sitting on this bench…
dreams coming true.

What do you dream of?

Where will your magical moment happen?


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​

My family and I went to Balsam Chutes with our cousin Sarah
and her daughters Izzy and Josie. They immediately jumped into the
water (life-jackets on of course!) and were swimming against the current.
All I could hear was hysterical laughter. Good clean fun!

It reminded me, once again, that we can create our own fun.
We don’t always need to be entertained. Of course, not everyone has rapids
close by. But connection is what matters; to nature and each other. Go to a
park and kick a ball around or get on the swings. Enjoy Nature.
There’s so much joy to be had. Listening to the kids and
adults having such a great time was just awesome.

I am so grateful.  So remember, get out there, and create your own fun!
Find a park, nature, walk, something.

Kids don’t need you to do everything for them.
They need you to do something with them.


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I had the pleasure of interviewing my friend, Gael Bishop on Hunter’s Bay
 (airing Saturday August 25th at 8am then available on the podcast). Larry the bernese mountain dog lay at her feet. Gael shares her story of addiction,
in hopes of helping others. I am just so proud of her. Here’s Gael:

Thank you, Yvonne, for reaching out on Facebook. I had broken my
anonymity two years into my sobriety. I try to be as open as I can through
social media. So today I wanted to talk about my journey and how difficult
it was for me to reach for help.

Many times when we hit rock bottom,
 it’s because we can’t see that there is actually something
on the other side that is going to help us
from the place that we’re in.

I clarified that it was a battle with alcoholism and Gael replies;
Absolutely, 100%! It has such an incredible grip on me that I experienced
that feeling of being completely imprisoned and not being able to break free.
Just the thought of not being able to live without alcohol—especially you
see it wherever you go—it’s glamorized. You wonder, “What would my life
be like without it… my social life?”But I was so broken that I had no other
choice but to leave alcohol behind. And now I can speak today, that I am in
a life that is worry-free because I am not held back by anything. I have no
filter. I have freedom. I want to reach out and help others, so they don’t’ have
to go down the same rabbit hole after rabbit hole after rabbit hole. Because
you’ll replace it with something else…

I interject: If you don’t develop coping skills, strategies, acceptance and forgive yourself!

And do your inventory. Go into your life and figure out, “Where is this
coming from?” It’s not your fault and it doesn’t necessarily have to be a fault
of anyone or anything. It can just be something that gets fixed, addressed.
Then you need to acknowledge that alcohol is not something you need in
your life. It’s destructive and it’s destroying millions of lives.

I can attest to the fact that alcohol has certainly negatively impacted
my family. I’m glad that you are creating a life you love every day and I
thank you for sharing. So, if you drink and it is not interfering with your life,
great. If alcohol has a grip on you or someone you love…reach out.
Find help. Find support.

This is the book I read and loved:
https://www.the30daysolution.com/.

Find Gael on Facebook. Gael can confirm and so can I…

You can live and love a sober life!


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​

As Geordie and I are creating our global movement--I Just Showed Up--
and sharing Love Your Life to Death with the world, we decided that as we transform our lives, we’d transform our home as well. Our kids went to camp,
and instead of relaxing and enjoying our time we ripped our house apart.
But it’s all good!

We have found wonderful painters and we’re going to have a new floor installed. We’ve spent our time unscrewing thing like switch covers with power tools
(they are fun!). We ripped out our carpet and it’s been a whole lot of work.
And of course, when you start really looking and seeing how awful the
doorknobs and hinges are, there’s so much more to do than we anticipated.
Isn’t that always the way?

But for the first time—we’ve renovated three houses before—we have actually
hired help and we are loving it!! They are Just Showing Up and doing a great job. It’s amazing!
​
We’ve shared every part of our journey with you, so we wanted to
share our home renovation too. We’ve posted the “before” pictures and we’ll
post “after” as well. And please just tell us you love it, even if you don’t. haha.
We love it and we want you to love it too so we’re excited to share.
We’re into renovations! Renovating our lives and our homes and everything!
Wish us luck!

And if you’re in a renovation project,
tell us all about it.
And good luck to you!


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I am so excited today, because I went to have coffee with my dear friend
Sandra Holdsworth. She shared that she had been to the Transplant Games
in Vancouver, BC, in July (2018) and excuse me… she came home with not
one but two medals and a beautiful trophy!!
“Sandra, I’m so proud of you. Tell us the story!”

S: The medals are from table tennis. It was a special day for me because
it was my 54th birthday. I received the gold for women over 50 and the silver
for mixed doubles! It was a lot of fun to participate with everyone. It’s my 9th Transplant Games. I think I’m the only athlete to compete in all nine!
The trophy, I was the recipient of was at the Gala. It is in memory of Gloria,
one of the founders of the Canadian Transplant Association. And what is
special to me is that previous recipients are past friends of mine—mentors.
So it’s a real honour to receive and help promote awareness.

Y:  You are so passionate about creating awareness and you are an organ
recipient—a liver transplant almost 22 years ago. You’ve always been grateful, sharing the message; “Let’s all be organ donors!” Because it saves families
and it saves lives.

S: It’s my way of giving back and it’s a way of saying thank you to my donor family, and to give people the opportunity to become part of the transplant community and attend the games where you make friends for life.

Y: Amazing! I attended the Transplant Games two years ago in Toronto and
it was magical! I loved every minute of it. Sandra, thank you for everything that you do to raise awareness. Congratulations on your medals and trophy.
And what does everyone need to do?

S: Please register your intention to be a donor (here)
and discuss your wishes with your family!

Organ donation saves families, saves lives
and it is an incredible gift!
We should all be registered organ donors.
I’m am. Are you?



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I’ve just arrived home from the grocery store and I have all kinds
of wonderful food to unpack. And I realized as I’ve done many times in
the past—I had been complaining:

 “Oh I have to go grocery shopping.  I don’t feel like shopping.
I’ll have to put all this stuff away and I have SO much to do.”

Then I stopped myself, and felt ashamed. I thought of all the people
who don’t have enough to eat, do not have food in the world—even in my
own community! Possibly in the same block as the wonderful grocery
store packed with food, so many things to choose from, anything and
everything you could want.

 I stopped myself and decided to be very grateful—grateful for groceries--
because it is a privilege to be able to go into a grocery store and come home
with an abundance of food. How many people wish they could do that?

So, if you’ve ever complained about shopping, forgive yourself, and choose
to be grateful each and every time you unpack groceries and pack your fridge.
 
Are you grateful for groceries?

​I certainly am!


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​

Together we are creating a culture of change!

I was so delighted to interview Carolyn Vandyken on my
Hunters Bay Radio Show. I thanked her for Just Showing Up
and creating change in the world and educating people about
pelvic floor health.  Here’s what she shared:

Most of us ignore our pelvic floor throughout our life span. It’s not that we
want to, we’re just not told about pelvic health. It’s a bit of a taboo subject,
but it shouldn’t be. We all own pelvic floors—men and women—and we are all affected by what is happening with those muscles.

They can be too tight and cause painful periods, intercourse and all sorts
of problems. They may be too weak and cause incontinence (leaking urine
or bowel issues). Statistically at this point, 1 in 2 of us end our life in diapers.

I must repeat: If you don’t think this is important information;

1 in 2 people, in their senior years, end up in diapers.

I personally would like to avoid that if possible!
And there are things we can do throughout our lives to change that!

Carolyn agrees: Completely avoidable!! 90% of incontinence can be easily
cured with some simple exercises. They’re not all kegels. Remember I said
tension is a problem, so often we have to learn to relax those muscles.

I want to share this information with everyone everywhere.
I also interviewed Carolyn on my ROGERStv Show. So many issues teens,
women and men have are avoidable or curable!

I encourage everyone with issues or learn prevention. Your pelvic floor
is very important and needs attention. Did you know it has five functions?
Learn and be healthy!

Take good care of your pelvic floor!
 
www.physioworksmuskoka.com
www.pelvichealthsolutions.com